


For a Friend

by clgfanfic



Category: Soldier of Fortune Inc.
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-11
Updated: 2012-11-11
Packaged: 2017-11-18 09:53:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,284
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/559683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clgfanfic/pseuds/clgfanfic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post "Surgical Strike."</p>
            </blockquote>





	For a Friend

**Author's Note:**

> Originally published in the zine Don't Ask, Don't Tell #1 with Maria Lopez.

Benny Ray Riddle took one last look around the kitchen, then headed into basement dayroom.  Walking to the couch, he reached down and picked up the paper, scanning the headlines and mumbling under his breath.  Paper in hand, he headed out.  On the stairs he passed his teammate, C.J. Yates, heading into the empty building with a cup of coffee and a small paper bag.  The demolitions man still looked pretty bad, the aftermath of the beating he'd endured in Libya still visible in the fading bruises and healing cuts on his face.

"Hey," Benny Ray said softly as they passed.

Three steps further on Benny Ray stopped and turned, catching C.J. on the bottom step.  "You okay, amigo?"

C.J. stopped as well, looking over his shoulder.  "Yeah," he replied, offering a thin smile.

Benny Ray nodded and returned the smile, then turned and completed his climb to the door.  Stepping out into the bright Southern California sun he squinted, watching two girls in thong bikinis glide by on roller blades.  He shook his head and grinned.  Walking to the bright red Dodge pickup, he unlocked the driver's side door and opened it, tossing the paper onto the seat, then started to climb behind the wheel.

He stopped, one foot on the floorboards.  "Damn," he sighed softly.  He had to go back.  C.J. was a member of his team, and if the SEALs had taught Benny Ray anything it was that loyalty to teammates was essential.

With another long, heavy sigh, he pressed the doorlock switch and slammed the truck door shut.  Shaking his head, he started walking back to the Silver Star.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

C.J. sat his coffee down on the endtable, and removed the small frame from the bag he carried.  With purposeful motions he inserted the small photos he had carried in his wallet for years, then fitted the back and secured it with the small tabs on the frame.  He sat it down next to the paper coffee cup, then stood and headed back to the door.

But before he reached the stairs he stopped, sighed heavily and walked back to the couch and sank back down.  Running his hands over his hair he leaned back and stared at the ceiling.

 

* ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *

 

Bouncing down the stairs and into the basement, Benny Ray found. C.J. settled on the couch, and a new framed picture on the endtable.

He ambled into the room, pausing to check out the photo in the frame.  C.J. and another man.  _His brother_ , the sniper guessed.  Without a word he dropped casually onto the other end of the couch.

"Said I was fine," C.J. said softly, staring at the floor.

Benny Ray shrugged.  "Might be what ya said, but it ain't how ya look."

C.J. lifted his head, tilting his chin to meet the sniper's appraising gaze.  "Just wanted to be alone."

Benny Ray tsked his tongue against his front teeth, his jaw twitching in irritation.  "Okay," he said, standing and heading back toward the stairs.  Before he reached them C.J.'s voice stopped him.

"Look, I'm sorry."

The sniper turned, looking back at the Brit.  The man's shoulders sagged and his gaze was imploring.  With a slight nod, Benny Ray walked back and sat down on the couch again.  "You wanna talk about it?" he asked.

C.J. snorted, a sardonic smile flashing across his face.  "Thought you'd be tired of listening to me by now."

Benny Ray shrugged, the half-smile on his lips saying the Brit wasn't far from wrong, but this was different.

C.J. met the man's eyes for several long moments, then said, "I hear you're the only one who thought I wouldn't talk.  Well, besides the major, maybe.  Mind if I ask why?"

The sniper leaned back and sighed.  He tsked again, then said, "The way I figured it, it was a blood thing."

"Blood?" the Brit echoed, surprised.

"Your brother."

"What about Danny?" C.J. asked, his tone razor-edged.

Benny Ray's expression didn't change.  "If you talked it'd dishonor your brother's memory.  I knew you wouldn't do that."

C.J. relaxed slightly.  "Yeah?  Well, wish I'd had the same confidence."

"You did," Benny Ray countered.

C.J. shook his head.  "I was there, mate."

"C.J., you believe every man's got a breakin' point?"

The Brit thought for a moment, nodded, then shook his head.  " _Most_ men, maybe, but Danny never broke." 

"You bet your ass he did," Benny Ray countered.

C.J.'s head came up, eyes flashing.  "My brother _died_ , damn you, he _didn't_ talk."

"Dyin's just another way of breakin'."

The Brit jerked like he'd been slapped.  He opened his mouth to argue, then closed it again as the truth of the man's words sank in.  His head dipped.  "He didn't talk… that's what matters."

"Hell, C.J. we'll all break, sooner or later.  Far as I'm concerned, dyin's the easy way out.  Survivin', fightin', takes real courage."

Staring at the framed photo, C.J. said, "He was my hero… always was."

"I understand that, amigo," the sniper said.  "You two were close?"

C.J. smiled shakily.  "Yeah.  We moved around a lot.  Mates were hard to keep, but we always had each other."

"How much older was he?" Benny Ray asked.

"Almost two years."

"He might'a been your hero, but I'll bet you fought like cats 'n' dogs."

C.J. chuckled softly, his eyes filling with unshed tears.  "We did."

"An' I'll bet ya tried to beat 'im at… everything," he said, not at all sure what young boys in England did.

C.J.'s head nodded as he reached out and picked up the framed photo.  He stared at his brother's image, then sat back, resting the picture frame on his chest.  "It was terrible," he admitted.  "Anything Danny did, I had to do better, or different.  Or at least I tried."

"That why you went SAS?"

A nod.  "Took me two tries to get into the regiment; I'm not a runner."

"Seen that."

C.J. flashed the sniper a sincere grin.

"That why you picked demo, too?"

Another nod.  "Danny was nervous around the stuff.  It was one thing I could do he couldn't."  C.J. picked the frame up, looking at the photo again.  "But he was still my best friend."

"Knew all your secrets, huh?"

"All of them," C.J. said, his voice just above a whisper.

"He know you're gay?"

C.J.'s head snapped to the right, his eyes wide.  "What?"

"He the only one you told?"

The Brit swallowed several times, panting slightly.  Then he nodded.  "He's the only one who accepted it, too.  He didn't judge me," he said, his eyes narrowing, challenging Benny Ray to do just that.

The sniper shrugged nonchalantly.  "He was your brother."

C.J. studied the sniper, looking for any signs of disgust or loathing, but found none.  "How'd you know?"

"My sister's gay," Benny Ray replied matter-of-factly.  "Got the same inklin' 'round you."

"Going to tell the major?"

Benny Ray shook his head.  "No reason."

The Brit's eyes flashed and went wide.  "Not what I expected, Huckleberry.  You're not–?"

"No," Benny Ray said, shaking his head, "but I've, uh, known a man or two."

"You?"

"Long story."

"I'd like to hear it one day," C.J. said sincerely.

Benny Ray leaned forward, resting elbows on his knees.  "What's really eatin' at you?"

C.J. took a long, deep breath, then said, "Okay…  I always thought Danny was the best.  He was smarter, stronger, more sure of himself.  Hell, he was even better looking."

Benny Ray snorted.  "Not so sure about that, amigo."

C.J. felt himself blush and grinned in spite of himself.  "Well, okay, so I was better looking, but he was more successful with the ladies."

"I'd guess so.  And?"

"And he was a _man_.  A _real_ man."

"C'mon, C.J., you're as much of a man as he was."

The Brit shook his head.  "I'm queer.  Danny knew, and he accepted it, but down deep?  I knew he was ashamed of me."

"I find that hard to believe," Benny Ray said.

C.J. shook his head, continuing, "When we were in that Libyan prison, dying side-by-side, he told me.  Not in so many words, but I got the message, loud and clear.

"He knew I was talking.  And I tried, Benny Ray, I really did.  I told them anything I could think of that didn't mean anything, but they wouldn't let up.  They kept coming at me again, and again, and again… and again.  I don't even remember telling them sensitive information, but I did.  And Danny knew I did.  He told me it was all right, that he understood…"

"But you don't believe that?"

C.J. met the man's eyes, his own full of tears.  "He forgave me _because_ I was queer.  I wasn't a real man, so how could he expect me to hold up like one?"

Benny Ray shook his head.  "That's bullshit."

C.J. smiled mockingly.  "Is it?  I lost it in Bosnia, didn't I?"

"Damn it, C.J. what's past is past.  You held up in Chili… Cuba, Haiti, and how many others?"

The Brit shrugged, but he didn't look convinced.  "I let him down, Benny Ray.  He was the one person who loved me as I was, and I let him down."

"And beating yourself up makes you feel better?"

A flash of anger crossed the smaller man's face.

"Guess that's the easy way," the sniper concluded.  "And you say you like the easy way."

"That's crap!"

"Is it?"

C.J. wiped his hand over his eyes, brushing away the tears.  "I just feel– I–"

"You're feelin' less 'n a man.  But you're wrong, _compadre_.  You might not be much of a runner, but you've got guts, and you know your stuff.  You wouldn't be part of this team if you didn't.  We all stumble sometimes.  You gotta get up and keep goin', or the bear's gonna catch'cha an' eat'cha."

"The bear?"

"Fear, friend."

C.J. weighed the man's words, trying to accept them.

"And who you sleep with ain't got a damned thing to do with it."

The Brit sniggered.  "Not what the military says."

"What I say."

"Why?"

Benny Ray paused a moment, then said, "One of my best friends in the Teams was gay.  Hid it, didn't see nobody.  Someone found out.  They were gonna drum 'im out.  He ate the barrel of a .45."

C.J. looked away.  There had been a few times he'd considered the same thing.  "I'm sorry."

"He was a damned good SEAL.  He was a good man."

"You're a good friend, Benny Ray," C.J. offered.  "Did he tell you?"

"Sent me a note before he re-decorated the wall."

The Brit shook his head.  "Doesn't seem fair."

"It's not."  Benny Ray moved next to the smaller man, reaching out and resting a supportive hand on the man's shoulder.  "Everyone breaks, whether you talk or die, it's all the same thing, and not a damned thing we can do to stop it.  The trick's surviving t' fight another day.  You been through Hell, it makes you stronger."

"Maybe," C.J. replied.  "I hope so.  I did know they weren't going to make me talk again.  I _knew_ that."

"And what happened in Bosnia ain't gonna happen again."

"I hope you're right."

"I am."

C.J. looked at the sniper, "Bloody arrogant, that's what you are."

Benny Ray grinned.  "When you're right, you're right."

C.J. felt the smile spread on his own face.  Damn, but the man was cute.  He dipped his head and raised his hands in a gesture of surrender.  "The great, all-knowing Huckleberry has spoken."

Benny Ray chuckled.

"I'm going to say something, and all I ask is, don't shoot me."

The sniper nodded.

"I could use a good fuck right now."

"Go get one."

C.J. shook his head.  "Too dangerous, and I don't mean just what you can catch."

"I understand," Benny Ray said.

The Brit's head dipped and his cheeks went red.  "Wish I could, uh, ask you…"

"Ask me what?"

"What do you think?"

"You mean–?"

C.J. nodded, then watched with fascination was the sniper actually considered the idea.  But he knew what the answer would be.  Benny Ray would say n–

"Okay."

"What?"

"I said okay.  But we better take this upstairs, just in case someone else comes back."

Blood drained from C.J.'s face, leaving him feeling lightheaded.  The room spun, so he closed his eyes.

"Change your mind?" Benny Ray asked.

The brown eyes popped open.  "No!  Uh, I– I don't know.  You'd _do_ that?"

"I said I would," Benny Ray said, standing.  He offered C.J. his hand.  "Come on."

C.J. reached out, taking the sniper's hand and letting the man tug him to his feet.  His knees were weak and he nearly had to sit down again.

"You okay, amigo?"

C.J. nodded.  "Just–"

Benny Ray interrupted, stepping close and brushing C.J.'s lips with his own.  The Brit's eyes immediately closed and he moaned, his arms reaching out to snake around the sniper's sides and pull him closer, deepening the kiss.

Feeling the sniper's teasing tongue, C.J. parted his lips, allowing the man access to his mouth.  Their tongues pared and explored.  Their hips pressed tightly together, bulges at their groins grinding.

"Upstairs," Benny Ray said breathlessly.

C.J. just nodded, too astonished to reply.

The sniper led the way up to one of the bedrooms Matt had set up for those times when they all needed to stay at the Silver Star before a mission.  It was C.J.'s room.  Without a word the two men stripped out of their clothes, C.J. dumping his into a pile on the floor while Benny Ray hung his carefully over the back of a chair. 

That done, Benny Ray pulled C.J. into another exploring kiss.  One of the Brit's hands wrapped around Benny Ray's cock, sending hot sparks of pleasure exploding through the sniper's entire body.

"Oh, damn," he breathed when they surfaced for air.

"What?" C.J. asked, stiffening.  _Here it comes, he's going to change his mind_.

"Don't have the necessary equipment, _compadre_."

Relief flooded through the smaller man and he squeezed the long, thick cock in his hand.  "Not to worry, mate," he assured.  "I'll take care of that."  He moved to the small desk and opened a drawer, rummaging through wire and other pieces of the demolitions trade, he pulled out a box of condoms and a tube of KY.

Benny Ray took out a single condom and the lube.  "Whatdaya want, compadre?"

"Inside me," C.J. said, his tone almost pleading. 

"Turn around," the sniper directed.

C.J. did as instructed, the thought of what was to come making him hard.  A hand between his shoulder blades forced him to bend over.  He braced himself with his hands against the surface of the bed and widened his stance.

"Some nice bruises," Benny Ray commented as his lube-coated finger poked against the Brit's puckered hole.

"Fading fast," he sighed, feeling a single finger slide into his chute up to the third joint.  Benny Ray wiggled his finger, sending waves of tantalizing sensations washing over him.  "Oh, God," he breathed.

 

After a moment the finger was withdrawn, replaced by two.  "Yeah… God," C.J. panted.  "That feels… so good."

"Been awhile?"

"Too long, mate, too long."

Benny Ray worked carefully and slowly, stretching the tight muscles until they were loose.  C.J. closed his eyes, his head arched back, his hips moving in small, tight circles against the ministrations.

The sniper used his free hands to grab C.J.'s balls, rolling them in his palm.  "Not too much," the Brit cautioned.  "It's been so long, no control."

Benny Ray stopped and withdrew his fingers a second time.  He slipped a condom on, then took the KY, rubbing it over his erection and C.J.'s ass.

"Like this," C.J. said, crawling onto the bed and turning over onto his back.  He raised his legs up in the air.  "Go for it, mate," he encouraged.

Benny Ray climbed onto the bed and maneuvered between C.J.'s thighs.

"Please," C.J. said.

Benny Ray slowly eased his thick cock into C.J.'s well-prepared ass.

C.J. still grimaced, and the sniper stopped, waiting for the man to adjust to his presence. 

When the Brit lowered his legs, draping them over the sniper's shoulders, Benny Ray pressed the rest of the way in.

"Man, you're tight… 'n' hot," the sniper hissed, grinding his teeth together to keep from shooting his load right then.

"Feels so good," C.J. replied.  "Do it."

Benny Ray began to move, gliding in and out in long, slow thrusts.

C.J.'s eyes closed and he groaned, low and deep.  "God yesss," he growled, squeezing the muscles in his butt and driving his hips against the invading cock, impaling himself over and over again.

Benny Ray pumped faster, C.J. meeting each thrust and enjoying the feel of Benny Ray's heavy balls slapping against his butt, heightening his pleasure.

Before long the sniper was shoving in all the way up to his balls, then pulling down to the very tip of his crown.  Their bodies gleamed with sweat, trickles of it running down their faces, twisted by the feeling shooting through their bodies.  They breathed hard and groaned softly.

Supporting himself on one arm, Benny Ray reached down and took hold of C.J.'s stiff cock, pulling in time with the rhythm his hips set.  Then he reached past and squeezed C.J.'s balls, making the Brit groan, half in pleasure, half in glorious pain.

Feeling his climax beginning to build, Benny Ray skewered C.J. faster and faster.  When his balls pulled up tight, he gave one last, mighty thrust, embedding himself to the very root of his cock.

C.J. felt the sniper start to shudder, his fingers tightening almost painfully on his balls.  Then the man cried out, and the Brit could feel the man's cock pumping its load into the condom.  He ground his hips tight against Benny Ray's groin and clenched his butt muscles over and over, milking the man dry.

Lost in the pure pleasure of his release, Benny Ray grabbed C.J. rock-hard cock, pulled and squeezed, pushing C.J. over the edge.  The Brit's load gushed out, one squirt after another, splattering against Benny Ray's chest.  The sniper reached in, squeezing the man's balls to drain every drop out of them.

When C.J.'s shudderings decreased and finally stopped, Benny Ray slowly pulled out his softening cock, crawled out from between C.J.'s legs and collapsed on the bed.

C.J. stretched his legs out, his ass sore but tingling with pleasure.  "That was good, mate," he panted.  "Very… very good."

Benny Ray chuckled.  "Can't complain.  Gotta wash up, water the snake."

The two men cleaned up and got dressed, neither saying much of anything.  Back in the basement, they sat on the couch, Benny Ray sipping on a beer, C.J. on a soda.

"Any regrets?" the Brit asked.

Benny Ray shook his head.  "Nope."

"Good," C.J. replied.  "Me, either.  Thank you."

"Any time," the sniper replied.

The Brit grinned playfully.  "Any time, huh?"

Benny Ray blushed.  "Not what I meant, but, uh…"

"What?"

"Wouldn't mind… every once in a while."

"Me, too, mate," C.J. said, his voice soft with gratitude and friendship.  "Me, too."


End file.
